


Because Somebody Has To

by Lunarflare14



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Difficult Decisions, Doubt, F/M, Grey Wardens, Mage!Female Hawke, Responsibility, Women In Power
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-21
Updated: 2015-03-30
Packaged: 2018-02-26 12:27:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2652059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lunarflare14/pseuds/Lunarflare14
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Being the Inquisitor requires making tough choices and sometimes it's all too much.</p><p>Varric is just trying to help. He's really good at it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

He found the Qunari woman alone on the battlements staring out at the mountains. The war council had been mentioning for hours that they should go looking but no one seemed willing to actually bother her. It was a lot, staring down a Dragon and thinking it may be the last thing you see before you’re crushed or frozen, THEN being named Inquisitor and having to pass judgement on someone. Varric approached her cautiously, like you may a wounded animal.

“Inquisitor?”

She looked over shoulder and raised he hand in acknowledgement. “Varric.”

He slid into the spot next to her and peered out at the little he could see from his short height. “The others wanted to come looking for you. They were reluctant to disturb you while you have a moments rest. But Cullen and Cassandra had started up another of their discussions that may end with a flipped table so…” The Inquisitor didn’t even crack a smile. “What’s on your mind, Adaar?”

She let out a long, tired sigh. “You know I went to the future right? I saw what Corypheus can do… What he will do if I don’t stop him.” Turning to look up at the keep, she leaned on the battlement. “The friends I brought with me on the journey to Redcliffe were imprisoned there. I released them, but they gave their lives for me to return.”

Varric grimaced. “Blackwall.”

The Qunari looked away and began to pace. “It wasn’t just him. Leiliana—she was the last to go. She withstood a year of torture and never gave them anything. She said something to me I would not forget. ‘To you this is just some nightmare. But for us, it was real’. I executed the Magistar out of rage, not mercy and not justice. I sentenced him for crimes he never got the chance to commit.” Crossing back over to Varric she looked down at him, eyes lost. “Blackwall was right to end it with me. If we’d gone any—…I do not know if I can be trusted with power.”

Varric laughed. He knew he shouldn’t but he couldn’t help it. “You two are so alike.” At the look of confusion she gave him, he elaborated, “You and Hawke. She was always so worried about that sort of thing—underneath all that sass and back talk. Well, then again she was a mage, so worrying about it probably saved her from becoming something horrible.” Varric leaned against the battlement. “Do you remember how she dealt with Anders, the man who blew up the Kirkwall Chantry?”

She thought on it a moment before answering. “She spared him. I remember thinking it was very noble of her to give him the chance to—”

“She spared him because she loved him.” Her face softened into something almost sad. “I know they expect you to be some kind of saint but you're not. All you can do is go with your gut... I’ll let you think on that.”

The dwarf went to leave the battlements but Adaar called to him, “Varric.”

Turning back to her, he smiled. “Yes, Inquisitor?”

“Do you think she regrets it? I asked her and she kind of just made light of it.”

Varric let the smile fall away and answered with a firm, “No. She doesn’t.... do you?'

"No," she was quick to answer. "If he could do that to our future once he was to big a threat to leave alive."

"See? You already sound like those four hot heads in the war room--who you should join when you're ready, by the way."

She gave the view of the mountains on last look. "One last thing."

"Yeah?"

"Would you do it all again?"

Varric laughed, loud and deep. "My lady, would I follow a strong warrior woman who takes no ones shit into almost certain death? It's becoming a bit of a pattern for me, to be honest.

For the first time since he arrived at the parapet, Adaar laughed. "I suppose I see your point." Somewhere far off in the keep, there was loud shouting beginning and Adaar rolled her eyes. "I should go make peace before it gets ugly. Thank you, Varric." She made her way past him and descended the stairs. 

"Just call me the Counselor of Champions."


	2. Chapter 2

Everyone knew the Inquisitor hadn’t been getting much sleep since Blackwall—no, Rainer left. Now that he was returned, in irons no less, she probably still wasn’t sleeping much. It had him worried. It had them all worried. He’d gone to see Rainer who just sat on the floor looking pathetic when Varric asked him questions. When Varric finally gave up the prisoner asked. “If she wanted me killed she could have left me in Val Royeaux. Why?”

Varric had shrugged. “Answer's pretty obvious to me.”

 

The Inquisitor was sitting in old library with her head in her hands when he found her. As he entered, she looked up, laughing bitterly.

“How do you find all my good hiding places?”

Varric shrugged. “Call it a gift.”

She sighed loudly, picking at a bit of the chipped wood with a throwing knife. There was a weight on her that he hadn’t seen in a long time.

Suddenly, Adaar spoke. “I contacted Warden-Commander Cousland.”

The dwarf nodded. “Impressive. What is her Majesty up to?”

“Looking to cure the Calling.” She leaned forward and set a bit of parchment on the table. “The queen requests I watch over Ferelden ‘until she can return to her king’.” Suddenly she stabbed the throwing knife into the table, causing him to jump. “Is every fucking woman in Thedas willing to do anything for love?” Varric stepped forward, but she gestured for him to stop. “I called in favors—a lot of favors, scrambling to collect enough support to have him released to me and I don’t even know what I’m going to _do_ with him. He’s just sitting in the cells. I should let him rot there.” He hadn't seen her this angry in a long time. Not at Alexius and certainly not at one of the Inquisition.

He laughed. Maybe that was unkind of him because she glared daggers his way. “We both know you have to properly sentence him.” When the ferocity of her gaze didn’t waiver he sighed. “You’re good at seeing through lies. I don't believe you didn't sense something was amiss."

Her glare softened and he wished he hadn’t mentioned that. “What will they say about the Inquisition now? We used the Grey Warden treaties before the Wardens were actually allied with us. They’re going to see me weaseling him out of execution. They’ll call us—“

“You’ve been spending too much time with the Orlesians. Since when do you care about appearances?”

She stood then, and several books toppled to the ground as she slammed her hands on the desk. “I care about my people! About how this makes them look!”

“And Blackwall isn’t your people?” Varric asked calmly. Her anger deflated, and she leaned forward, putting the weight on her fists. “You have all rights to be angry with him. I’m pretty ticked off myself. What he did was horrible and he gets that, and he lied which is also horrible and he gets that too. We're a lot better off then when we used the treaties. We've got supplies and gold enough to pay them back ten times over and the actual Warden's on our side now. What does his death accomplish? Whatever he did in the past changed him. I don’t know if he’s a ‘good’ man yet but I think, if you give him the chance, he’ll surprise you.”

She looked up at Varric with a weak, sad smile. “I think he’s surprised me enough for one life time. My one happiness… the one thing I take for myself and it blows up in my face… Me, the Champion, the Hero of Fereldan, Andraste herself. The things we’ve done. The things we’ve _forgiven_.”

“Didn’t end the world. Feels like it did but the world is still spinning.”

Standing once more the Inquisitor rubbed her knuckles. “I suppose I made my decision a long time ago. I’m not hiding from him anymore.”

The dwarf nodded. “Good.”

Moving to the doorway she sighed. As she passed he heard her mumble. “I understand what Cole meant.”

“What did the kid say now?”

She smiled. It was something she wasn’t doing a lot these days. “Varric is quiet inside. Makes me feel more here. Calls me kid. A friend.”

And Varric didn’t know what to say to that. “He said that?”

“Yeah, usually what he says is just gibberish to me. But that… that I get.” She put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed. “I know it’s hard with me as the Herald, but you are my friend Varric. From the moment we met. I’m glad my judgement isn’t completely wrong.”

Varric put his hand on hers, squeezing back. They turn together and left the library. “You never know, Inquisitor. I could turn out to be just a bunch of nugs operating a dwarf suit.”

That made her laugh, loud and deep. “You are a true asset to the Inquisition.”


End file.
